STARCROSSED

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my heart is dead

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forgive me,

for every feelings i hide,

for my heart has bled too much..

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forgive me,

for every flowers left unsent,

for every poems left unread,

for every drawings left unsketched,

for every pictures left unpaint,

for every minute left unspent,

for every words left unsaid..

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forgive me,

FOR MY HEART IS DEAD.

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youppe

*hopefully when it’s healed (cewah!!), i didnt miss anything, bcos i know i would regret my whole life if i do.
(just what the hell i’m talking about?)

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THERE’S A STAR

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there’s a star,

once came down upon my cloudless sky,

and illuminated my seasons of starless nights…

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there’s a star,

that breathed life into my swollen empty heart,

and shook me up from my endless dreams of life..

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there’s a star,

with such unparalleled grace,

once shone a path when all sense of direction was lost,

when I’m tangled up in all these confusing darkness,

I’ve seen how crooked and weary my roads have been,

I’ve felt how pretentious and stale my feelings have become,

I’ve watched it all free-falling, and went down..

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there’s a star,

that swept all my carelessness away,

and put purpose in my steps,

so I know where I’m heading, and won’t falter again..

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there’s a star,

that gave the happiest of joys and the saddest of sorrows,

and to which I’ve bared all of my heart,

and all of my soul..

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tonight I wonder,

as I gaze upon the starry sky,

on how my life would’ve been,

if the star never came down,

on where would I be heading right now,

if God never crossed our paths,

on just how lucky and humbled I am,

to feel Heaven and its Angel this close to me..

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and however far away,

and whatever hurtful words I might say,

i know there’s always one star that outshone the others,

and could never, ever be replaced,

and I know these feelings won’t change a bit,

until my journey comes to its eventual end..

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there’s a star,

and everytime I think of how it all began,

i wonder, with hopelessness,

on how all of these,

would finally end..

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youppe

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well, just a little something i made, round about last year i guess. planned to give it to someone on birthday, but i have no time to finish it, due to so much work (mase tgh amik multidip).. so i just gave gift & card.. n planned to finish it for next year’s birthday.. BUT (ahaha)… i think this time around i dont have the same oppurtunity to give this piece of writing (and i dont even know what happend to the gift).. so.. think i’ll just put it here..

moreover someone asked me, why dont i put my own writings (poems or lyrics) as i do write quite a number of those… well, here is one.. the others, tgkla kalau ade mase (tapi rase mcm malas aje nak taruk for public ahaha)..

check out faqroul’s blog (nanti taruk link) for some excellent poem made by himself..

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THIS IS THE CRAZE ONLY WE CAN BESTOW,

THIS IS THE PRICE WE PAY FOR LOST OF CONTROL,

THIS IS THE BREAK IN THE BATTLE,

THIS IS THE CLOSEST OF CALLS,

THIS IS THE REASON YOU’RE ALONE,

THIS IS THE REASON YOU FALL.

check out this post titled ‘plain stupid…’, at stretch2thefullest.blogspot.com. deep, full of killer quotes, and written with exceptional skills. wish i had the time to write more in this blog, to write stuffs in my head. i like writing, just dont have the time. ko cuti stretch, lain la!! nyways, this is a reply to your post, just an extension to what i said in the car hari tu, but i hope it helps la. chow bro!!

and also, check out acai and mache’s blogs, you’ll find the link at stretch’s page.

Comment:

mmm… giler byk quote ko yg best str ahahha!! ko mmg dewa ayat la… papehal pon, in my opinion la… is it worth it, all the time and troubles, having someone, just for the sake of having someone, just like everybody else?(ahaha paham ke ni, aku harap ko paham la).for me these things, we cant look for it. we cant go and find it. it could work, but it wont be as meaningful as you’d hope. these things come to you, just out of the blue, when u least expect it. it just came. n then you would really know what ‘falling in love’ means. and we always have friends, lots of them. we’re never lonely. dont look for it, man. just wait.

..my heart may have skipped a beat everytime i see you, but still it is all yours..

"..nobody wants to live in the past. but when you’ve bled, sweat and cried so much for something, no matter what happens, it’ll always be there.."

- a quote from my great friend, a brother from our school days, Stretch (or Amir, he’s still single), in his blog at stretch2thefullest.blogspot.com (check it out). anyway if u’re wondering, he’s talking about koleq (MCKK) our school, on why us the old boys are so attached to their ‘old school’, as there are others who asked (or complained??). there’s much more than just studying in here. we survived 5 years here and grew as brothers, and become men. there were lessons of life we would never learn from somewhere else. i’m glad we all met up. and hell we’re proud. so to all my brothers of blood, sweat and tears, here’s to the sleepless nights and the endless days. cheers!!!

*and yeah, when u give and receive so much for something, no matter what happen, and however the endings, good or bad, happy or sad, it’ll always  be there, and always be special. i guess..

..all those feelings, those YESTERDAY’S FEELINGS, will all be lost in time,

but today, i’m wasting away, for today is on my mind…

yesterday’s feelings

Forgive and forget. Grudges only weigh you down and inspire unhappiness and grief. Soar above it, and remember that everyone makes mistakes.

- its good to know that some people still mean what they say, and have the guts to actually do the right things. the world would certainly be a better place. its easy to know the rights and the wrongs, and to speak of it so proudly, but its always hard to justify all the words with action. well, there are even some people who say/write things only for other people to say, "eh, baiknye die ni…", for self-satisfaction, but don’t have the courage to put it in action. so God, bless the people who only have good in their hearts and always have the courage to do the right things. bless them who always think of others before themselves, may all of them be embroiled in Your blessings.

talk is cheap, feelings are expensive.

inhale.

here by me

by 3 doors down

I hope you’re doing fine out there without me,
‘Cause I’m not doing so good without you,
The things I thought you’d never know about me,
Were the things I guess you always understood..

So how could I have been so blind for all these years?
Guess I only see the truth through all this fear,
And living without you…

EVERYTHING I HAVE IN THIS WORLD,
AND ALL THAT I’LL EVER BE,
IT COULD ALL FALL DOWN AROUND ME,
JUST AS LONG AS I HAVE YOU,
RIGHT HERE BY ME.

I can’t take another day without you,
‘Cause baby, I could never make it on my own,
I’ve been waiting so long, just to hold you,
And be back in your arms where I belong..

Sorry I can’t always find the words to say,
But everything I’ve ever know gets swept away,
Inside of your love…

EVERYTHING I HAVE IN THIS WORLD,
AND ALL THAT I’LL EVER BE,
IT COULD ALL FALL DOWN AROUND ME,
JUST AS LONG AS I HAVE YOU,
RIGHT HERE BY ME.

As the days grow long I see,
That time is standing still for me,
When you’re not here..

EVERYTHING I HAVE IN THIS WORLD,
AND ALL THAT I’LL EVER BE,
IT COULD ALL FALL DOWN AROUND ME,
JUST AS LONG AS I HAVE YOU,
RIGHT HERE BY ME.

the boy who blocked his own shot

if it makes you less sad, I will die by your hand,
I hope you find out what you want,
I already know what I am…
And if it makes you less sad, we’ll start talking again,
And you can tell me how vile,
I already know that I am…
I’ll grow old and start acting my age,
I’ll be a brand new day in a life that you hate..
a crown of gold, a heart that’s harder than stone,
And it hurts a whole lot, but it’s missed when it’s gone..

If it makes you less sad, I’ll move out of the state,
You can keep to yourself,
I’ll keep out of your way…
and if it makes you less sad, I’ll take your pictures all down,
every picture you paint,
I will paint myself out…
it’s cold as a tomb, and it’s dark in your room,
when I sneak to your bed to pour salt in your wounds..
so call it quits or get a grip,
say you wanted a solution, but you just wanted to be missed..

YOU ARE CALM AND REPOSED,
LET YOUR BEAUTY UNFOLD,
PALE WHITE, LIKE THE SKIN STRETCHED OVER YOUR BONES,
SPRING KEEPS YOU EVER CLOSE,
YOU ARE SECOND-HAND SMOKE,
YOU ARE SO FRAGILE AND THIN,
STANDING TRIALS FOR YOUR SINS,
HOLDING ON TO YOURSELF THE BEST YOU CAN,
YOU ARE THE SMELL BEFORE RAIN,
YOU ARE THE BLOOD IN MY VEINS…

Call me a safe bet, i’m betting i’m not,
i’m glad that you can forgive,
only hoping that as time goes,
you can forget..